So this post will be about random thoughts that have been floating around in my mind that I’m too lazy to formulate full posts about. :) Plus, I’ve been writing a lot lately because I’ve been home (2+ feet of snow outside, homebound, bleh..)
- One of the most popular Muslim scholars in the west (or used to be popular) is facing some really tough times right now. I don’t want to mention his name but I’m pretty sure you know who I’m talking about and if you don’t, you’ll know by the end of this paragraph. I always get sort of defensive whenever someone speaks negatively of him, or if I read the countless articles written against him. I’ve tried to be subtle about it, well..not really but, believe me I have many reasons for why I fail to accept people’s (mostly the media) accusations against him. While I was working over the Summer, I used to listen to his Seerah series pretty frequently. Someone recommended it to me and after the first CD, I was hooked. SubhanAllah, he speaks with such passion, jazbah..that it’s hard not to get caught up in it and feel exactly what he’s feelings. Another amazing thing is that he was able to bring the Seerah of Rasulullah (Salallahu Alayhi Wasallam) to life. I say that because I got a clear picture of each story he narrated, almost like a 3D view of everything. Pretty cool. I remember once when I was coming back from work, he was sharing the story of Salman al Farisi (ra). When he got to the part where Rasulullah (Salallahu Alayhi Wasallam) planted each of the 100 palm tree seeds with his own hands, I remember my vision was so blurred (on the highway) that I had to pullover on the side. So I stopped the car and I just let out a waterfall. It was one of the most touching, iman-lifting, amazing experiences I’ve ever had. There were lots of other times I cried and laughed throughout the series too…I’ll name a few others, *explanation of the miracle of Surah Rum *explanation of Khalid bin Waleed (ra) preference of eating a dabb *story of Ayyub (as) and His patience, hence sabr Ayyub *story of Abu Bakr (ra) fighting the kuffar to protect Rasulullah (S) and how he lost so much hair and blood *story of Musaylama al Kathaab’s horrible poetry lol. *Rasulullah (S) treatment of war prisoners *The time when Rasulullah (S) lost two of his teeth in battle. *When the Kuffar said things about their idols Uzza and Lat (We have Uzza and you have no Uzza, Nauthubillah), Rasulullah (S) responded and said Allahu ‘Ala wa Ajal…and many others. And if you’re wondering, yes I cry a lot :) (with good reason I hope). So my point is that he has really impacted my understanding this deen. After years and years of listening to him and taking notes on his incredibly ‘ilmified talks, I have never ever come across any harsh views that are contrary to Islam. Allahu ‘Alim if the accusations against him are true. I don’t know, and if they are, I pray that Allah guides him and all of us. We all make mistakes. May Allah protect him and all the scholars of our religion. May he never ever come under the hands of the oppressors again. Wherever he is, May Allah provide for him and increase him in ‘ilm and ‘ibadah. Ameen. Also on a side note, any real scholar of Islam will never be found in the palace of a minister or gov official, they’re usually the one’s facing hardship. Go back in any part of Islamic history and see for yourself.
- This is going to sound a little weird, but oh well. I wish I had a heavy voice only for when I recite Qur’an. I know it sounds weird, like I’m asking for a dude’s voice or something, but I have a point. See, some of us women have high pitched voices. When I hear amazing Qura’a, I’m like “man! I wish I could recite like that” but I can’t. :( I can only hold my breath so long, I don’t have the lungs of a hafidh, and my voice just doesn’t go that low. So I’ve been working on tone recently. I have a decent grasp on Tajweed Alhumdulillah but I never really focussed on tone that much. Now that I have…this is what I’ve come up with: My overall tone is that of my childhood Tajweed teacher and my current tajweed teacher, Sr. Asma of Al Huda Inst. My madd’s sound like Salah Bukhatir’s. My endings are sometimes like Hudaify, Sudais, or my own twist. The overall pitch of my tone also fluctuates from time to time, but I can never get it to where I want it. Khair. I think it’s fun to ‘experiment’ with your voice. I get excited when I discover a new tone or new way of shifting my voice (i don’t know the technical term for this)..especially when it’s easily doable and doesn’t require too much energy. Having amazing Qiraat is a huge blessing SubhanAllah. Every time I pray Jum’uah at MC, I’m in tears by the time our Imam is half way through Al-Fatiha. His qiraat is really moving MashaAllah. May Allah preserve him. Ameen.
- I need to sleep less, eat less, and talk less. I think these three things can be a few of the biggest (if not the biggest) obstacles for serious students of this deen, or even people who are serious about ‘ibadah. If a person can learn to curb these desires, it may make it easier for them to get closer to Allah azzawajal bi’ithnillah. For me personally, some days I can sleep a few hours and still be fresh at Fajr time. Other days, I can barely pray Fajr and give it it’s haq and that leads me to falling asleep soon after so I can’t stay up to memorize. I also shouldn’t sleep after ‘Asr…ever. I heard a hadith about this but I can’t remember it so I won’t guess what it said or meant. Food. Food is good, Alhumdulillah but we should make an effort to eat less. Over the summer, I was pretty good about keeping up with the 1/3 rule but once school started, everything went upside down. I stopped eating at the right times and eating healthy was not so important anymore. InshaAllah, I want to make myself immune to eating less and eating at the right times, no matter where I am. Lastly, talking. Ammi said she noticed a change in me after A Heart Serene lol. Alhumdulillah. :) I want to keep up the habit of opening my mouth once I have throughly thought out what I want to say and determined whether or not my speech is true, good, and beneficial.
That’s enough writing for today. I hope my writing isn’t wishful thinking, if it is..I should stop writing. :p
Allahumma-j’alna min al-mutahajjideen, waj’alna min as-saaleheen, wa taqabbal salaatana wa salaati al muslimeen ajma’een. Yaa muqaleeb-al-quloob, thabbit quloobana ‘ala deenik. Ameen!
O Allah make us of those who pray tahajjud, and make us of the Saalih, and accept our prayers and the prayers of all the Muslims. O changer/turner of hearts, fasten our hearts on your Deen. Ameen!